Friday, August 22, 2008

mum.. i'm sorry

finally.. i've to tell her the truth. this few days i've been trying to cover this bad news from her.. but fire can't be wrapped in a paper. it will sooner or later be reveailed and she will know the truth soon.. what i gotta do? she has been asking me the same questions for numerous times. what did u get for your last exam? and today.. this very tiring and day full of gloomy. i've told her. that i got a D for my previous exam. her voice. and that moment. turned into another voice which i didn't hear before since i meet her 18 years ago.. i know she was totally disappointed.. high hopes had she laid on me.. and never had i upset her before.. but this time.. i knew she was totally disappointed with my performance. i knew. everyone beside me told me to put the blame on activity i joined. but, if i really regretted or vowed to turn over a new leaf, i'll never be indulging in any activities for now.but sad to say, i'm still as busy as ever.. i'm so sorry.. i felt so guilty.. this is the last thing i want to happen. to disappoint my mum. but i'd done it. i'm really tired. MERIT POINTS?!! i wanna give up. i couldn't affort. i'm not superman. nor iron man.. i'm just a normal man. i'm xian ren... not chao ren.. being sick for 2 days, plus lack of time to study and numerous activities and responsibilites yet to come for this week.. i'm gonna be dead soon.. how i wish i can be like my coursemate.. staying inside my room studying.. enjoying and relaxing myself.. i felt really tired.. i wanna rest. but i do not have the time. my progress in study is slow. i'm gonna fail the second module if i continue like this.. i'm sorry mum.. i disappoint you...

heart breaks when your hope fades.. when you made someone drop a tear, you're slicing your heart out from you..

i'm sorry.. mum.

4 comments:

fraternity-kt said...

actuali i also dun know to say wat..
im oso sick these few days..i know hw u feel but after this we can relax abit n dun take too much activities la..i think that we almost have enough merit to stay kt next year..this is wat my buddy said la..
after enter UKM,i seem like dy change my life style..from a person who sleep at 12pm evryday to a person who just sleep after 2pm..i also duno is good things or bad 1..but sometimes i reali enjoy when take part in many activities with u all..although some maybe becoz of merit but i think if gota group of friends then the things will become very fun..
duno la..c how after this ba...
but "yong bu yuan bai"..

nicole Q said...

Failing once is not the end of the world, but a step closer to success.
Do your best and you will get what you want eventually. :)
never give up. yong bu yan bai!
I will always support you..
jia you jia you!

Anonymous said...

Be Strong - Delta Goodrem
Are you swimming upstream in oceans of blue?
Do you feel like you're sinking?
Are you sick of the rain, after all you've been through?
Well i know what you're thinking when you can't take it.
You can make it. Sometime soon i know you'll see.
Coz when you're in your darkest hour and all of the light just fades away.
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of grey.
Well hang on & be strong.
We're taking each step one day at a time.
You can't lose your spirit.
Let live and let live forget and forgive.
It's all how you see it and just remember keep it together.
Don't you know you're never alone?
Coz when you're in your darkest hour and all of the light just fades away.
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of grey.
Well hang on & be strong.
No you're not defeated and soon you'll be smiling once again.
Then you won't have to feel it.
Let it go with the wind.
Time passes us by and know that you're allowed to cry.
Coz when you're in your darkest hour and all of the light just fades away.
When you're like a single flower whose colours have turned to shades of grey.
Well hang on & be strong.
{Don't give up Hiang Jin! You'll be in my prayers.}

jacquez said...

thx to all my friends. by the way.. who is the anonymous..?