Saturday, March 28, 2009

lost in a battle

I’ve tried to keep my feelings but I really can’t.
Twice I tried to keep it to myself, not wanting to affect others feelings
But sorry.
I can’t
I’ve to lash it out somewhere..
I tried to go to bed
To sleep
To forget this problem
But I can’t
And here I was
Awake again
Shedding tears again
2nd time of the night
I do not know why
But really quite emo
Tried to contain myself
Failed again
Just like what I did in my exam
Tension arised.
I know
Everyone is feeling the same
I just lack of that important thing
The thing that can build my confidence n optimistic.
Kept on thinkin of the negative part.
It caught me.
Stress. Here u are
U won
I admit.
I lost.
I am succumbed to stress
Every night I slept
With guilty of not finishing my studies
But I;m exhausted. I’m tired.
I cant. The same old problem arised.
My roommate is too great. He is giving me pressure . indeed
I kno he didn’t mean it. and I tried to ignore it..
I know many of u will falter also if u r in the same situation.
Every night.. if u sleep much earlier than him.. and every day spent less time studying than him,..
Will u think what u studied is enough?
Will u think what u covered is complete?
Will u think u r ready for exam?
I’ve been trying.
But really every tired. Gonna give up soon..
Every night still awake by 2or even 3am..
But there r ppl sleeping late at 4 or 5am..
Will u think u r well enough>
It is not the matter of comparing with other ppl
Is the matter of whether u can go through yourself of not feeling guilty.
Of feeling ready even thou u study much less.
I don’t know.
My mood is bad,,
Lash it out on u..
Sorry sorry..
My fault.
academic pressure surely gain the edge over me now..
lost in a great battle..
less than 4 weeks
4 modules.
4 once n 4 all
some more so many haiz.. dunno how to say..
calm down..... fu fu fu fu...
i'm fine.


cyin said...


hc said...

it happened to me also .. o no ..
dunno when it'll come again..
hope it won't happen..
smile smile
we can de!

kee tat said...

dun too stress..dun compare to other..just do your best..every ppl got different aim..try your best..
dun treat it as a pressure..think +ve,u can benefit from it..u can ask him what u not understand..
Yong Bu Yan Bai